wow i really need to stop trying to convince myself that i am alright. fuck you fuck you!!! i've come to the point where i don't even wanna talk to you or see you!!!! your actions piss me off. your draggy emotions piss me off too. be a guy for goodness sakes. pffft, deep inside i know i'm just pissed cos someone else got to meet you before i did and refuses to return your fucking heart. and im pissed cos i wasn't good enough in your eyes to make you want to move on. im also pissed cos i cant stop myself from hanging out with you even though IN MY MIND, I SINCERELY DO NOT WANT TO BUT OH WTF MY HEART ALWAYS WINS. mind over matter?!!? since when?!!?!?

also, everytime i tell someone what im thinking i just feel super vulnerable to that person. like now your thoughts are open to mocking and scorning. you know. wow, why did i grow up to be an angsty teenager instead of a happy smiley girl. sometimes i really believe it has to do with my childhood. repressed emotions all pouring out now. can't help it eh, i dont wanna burst and die.

alright. be cool cherr, be cool. thats what you are. the girl who feels nothing. oh yea baby.