working 7-4.30am is fine, just gets pretty frustrating when i don't know how to handle a case. then again, its first day on floor so i guess its fine. i hope it gets better, gotta try and rmb more stuff.

gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. mood hasn't been up there.

I guess it's okay to cry once in awhile.

FUCKING CUTE AH. BABY MOUSE :D:D:D !!
still remember the day i found 4 of these dead in my cage.... i was just too late. i want baby mice ):

anyway not many people love what i love and see what i see. somehow we just can't click on this deeper level. but nevermind. i mean if you can think baby mice are gross then we have nothing more to say to each other right? :D

i just watched Just like Heaven (old movie) hahaha omg!! its like fucking romantic please! gahhhhhhh (:

okay i think if i don't sleep now i'm gonna regret like shit tomorrow morning HAHAAHAH bye

anyway drinking and getting drunk is not cool okay ITS NOT COOL HAHA WHY DO PEOPLE DO IT. it doesnt even feel good. do hangovers feel good? does vomiting in your hair feel good? NO SO DON'T DRINK PEOPLE. or at least don't drink till you get drunk. srsly -_-

quite sad if you have to watch dramas to remind yourself that there is hope right. like there is a chance you can achieve something in the dramas.

anyway i can't believe i have been going to work religiously and i was even early today. sometimes i amaze myself, sigh.

im so sad ): there are two dead baby pigeons on my parents window sill. awww ): i watched generations of birds grow up there and these 2 just didn't make it ): no amount of sad faces can show how sad i am. think its mom abandoned it. man, i think when my mice die i will srsly spend a whole day crying. ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))): SAD.

i never thought i'd ever say this because i used to think it was tacky but THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY [TGIF].

anyway you know sometimes you say no one listens to you then someone would say "how can people listen if you dont share?" like fuck it la what kind of friend are you if you can't tell something is troubling me. why cant you ASK.

i think i'm quite sad that i have a lan jiao bin. no matter how girly i dress i always look so.. not girly. face not good, body not good, people skills not good. OMG. zzz super low self esteem.

aiyar ): falling into the unhappy cycle again. after so fucking longgggg whyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

i yearn SO badly for a new camera.

i never understood why relatives have to exchange gifts according to the festivals. for example, moon cake festival round the corner, my mom would buy mooncakes for the aunt whose closes to us then as a form of gratitude my aunt would buy her own mooncakes and pass it back to us. just like when its my birthday you get something for me then come your birthday i have to return something as a gesture of appreciation.

i know, i know. its like, custom to return the favor. but see, if you dont return the favor the other party will probably think that you're the kind who takes and takes but never gives back. so that brings us to the point of whether the other party gave with the intention of receiving something back right? i mean who the hell likes to give and give for free. so what IS the point of giving?


yay i survived two days of work though its just training. can't wait till actual work starts cos my shift is from 7pm to 4.30am hahaha. my brain functions better then. okay. this sem's results came out yesterday. was really fucked but nevermind. anyway yx dont be sad okay!

OKAY. gonna sleep now. byeee.

i think if you're especially bad at or guilty about something, you will feel like everything the world says pertaining to that something is aimed at you and out to make you look bad. that's the reason why some of us feel extra irritated when some things are said while others feel like its not a big deal. and so i realised that i have so many things that i am bad at and guilty of. showing that you're irritated only means weakness and i'm not gonna let my weakness get the better of me.

sigh then again, i get really irritated at people's stupidity and disability to do things right. like how they can send an email to cherryl_lum@hotmail.com and still say "Hi Cheryl!" fucking stupid.

okay long time since i blogged. been having a comp on and off. my com is being fixed somewhere and since then i really dont have the mood to do much on the comp cos all my data is not w me.

anyway the most fucked up thing happened ah i didnt manage to send jiawen off at the airport cos i got her flight time mixed up. she told me 1010 i forgot to ask her night or day so i just assume night ah HAHAHA. and at 9.30am she texted and said "babe where are you" i still can reply her "at home" sheesh. sad ah was super upset the whole day hahaha.

gah duno why i feel so sian now. think i sleep too much so ended up being even more tired and listless. nvm byeeeeee.

""

aww this video makes me cry hahahaha

Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need

Whenever the end is
Do you think you can see it?
Well until you get there
Go on go ahead and scream it
Just say it.
-OneRepublic


p.s words of frustration/anger -- my mistake, my misunderstanding.

:D

HAHAHAH HANNAH MONTANA DAMN FUNNY MAN. I LAUGH UNTIL I CANNOT BREATHE HAHAHHAA

how i met your mother, big bang theory and vampire diaries are finally coming back this september. no more boring hols!

you know, everytime i watch the youth olympic advertisements or like yellow ribbon project advertisements i will tear. i know its weird but i really just feel their passion to start anew or their passion for whatever sport they are doing.

probably cos i've never been so passionate about anything at all in my life. i dropped piano, quit ballet, never felt much for studying, never excelled in anything know wht i mean? pretty sad cos im getting older but not gaining any much more.

aiyo.

mood like shit today.

amazing how some people just annoy the shit out of you without actually doing anything. just hearing their name or seeing them sign in on MSN makes you irritated.

anyway my baby Sony Vaio can't even on so i think im gonna lose all the data in it. but i must thank it for remaining strong for me for my last semester's projects and exams. sigh.

okay the only things filling my head now are vulgarities so byebye.

today was like healthy day.

ate astons at bedok then went marine parade and walked to east coast park Mcdonalds then to carls junior. not near okay! sat for awhile then decided to go play pool so walked from carls to parkway center. then after that walked to eunos area hahahahahaha my legs are so gonna ache tmr.

walau i want to go bkk!! will they stop bombing alrdy!?

wow now i know how it feels like when you're the only happy person on earth at the moment. quite a feat for me. not exactly over the moon but i really haven't been upset over anything much for damn long already. well, not since exams ended and ALL my friends are just plagued with problems right now. some i can't solve, some i can only listen. hohum.

relationships are such a pain in the ass. i mean i've always hoped for some prince charming to sweep me off my feet and dance with me in a mysterious secret garden (in singapore you'd probably be caught for trespassing) or beside a lake at sundown when the water reflects the orange gentle sun set. watch too many dramas. i hate that we have so much technology now. fucking hell if i wanted to run away from home and into my prince charming's arms, literally run like in the olden days, i'd probably end up flagging a cab or texting him to pick me up or something. how do they run in those huge dresses anyway, so unrealistic. maybe last time no global warming.

whatever happened to all the romantic gestures instead of just sending a "i miss you" or "i hope you get well soon honey!" or "i wish you were here" text -_- fucking hell if you really wished i was there come find me and i will be there with you. and i HATE, i mean absolutely HATE IT when guys text and say "aww sick?! i hope you get well soon!!" like fucking hell i've come to a point in my life where words are plain CHEAP, DIRT CHEAP to me. especially guys who claim they like you. call me a bitch but no action no talk. you wanna talk big about sending me home even if you live damn far away and all, sure, show me you can do it. sigh, get pissed thinking about how cheap today's guys are and how freely they throw words around like they carry no weight. thats why i feel especially sad when i see how my girlfs camp by the phone just waiting aimlessly for ONE sweet text from their boyfs. fuck all their boyfs. have some balls, be a real gentleman ok, not some cheap bastard who takes the easy way out.

for example (good example) when i broke up in j2 i was like fucking upset and one of the guys that formed an impression was nicholas peck. he didn't just sit behind his computer screen and type "i hope you feel better already!" fuck that. he came all the way to my house and gave me a whole bunch of chocolates. now that's what im talking about. action.

i don't know. i think its experiences like that that keep pushing up my expectations of guys. which is why i really can't stand guys who just talk and talk. text-chasing was so secondary school. sigh. its quite bad by the way, i get so irritated by what they do i just totally rule them out without even considering. walau, gonna be left on the shelf old woman.



yup. i really like to blog about random things huh.

ugh. have been under the weather for days now its not fun anymore. speaking of under the weather, i rarely get sick because everytime someone coughs or sneezes in public i would hold my breath till i couldn't take it anymore. no, really. not saying it works but i feel alot safer and honestly i RARELY fell sick.

i mean compared to the percentage of like, dilys jiang falling sick HAHAHAHAHAH fucking joke. last time in JC, every 2 or 3 days dilys would send g,v, and i a text saying stuff like,

"hey girls, i'm having really bad cramps, can't make it to school today"
"hey girls, i'm having fever, dad says i should stay home and rest!"

then soon after it just became,

"hey girls, i'm not going to school today"

HAHAHAHA. man. its kinda nice to have memories like that from parts of your life ah. they'll really carry you forward when all hope is lost. just that very few people actually sit down and reminisce like that. life's all about moving forward now i guess.


on a totally unrelated matter, i really think there's a limit as to how much a friend can interfere in your decisions. ever heard of respecting someone's decision? i trust you have. even if you are really unhappy with your friends decision (which in anyone's opinion is not even a fucking big deal), pushing her to a corner and leaving her with nothing is totally uncalled for. when 123 was afraid to tell you about the matter i even encouraged her saying, she's your best friend i believe she will support your choice and she will never make things difficult for you even if she didn't like it. guess i was wrong and true enough, 123 knows you better. i won't say much. except for, find a solid and sole reason to support your view and think again before you throw away friendship thats close to heart.

last night was fucking awesome. despite wanting to vomit most of the time. hahahha
went to sing k with jiawen nelson joshua and meiling. omgggggg it was totally like jay chou night hahaha BUT IT KINDA SUCKED COS I HAD SORE THROAT AND COULDNT SING ANY SONGS WITH HIGH NOTES ): and my kbox buddies are going away soon awwww. army and overseas intern. ):

HEHEHE BUT IT WAS STILL AWESOME. we took polaroids after. THNK YOU AGAIN JIAWENNNNNNNNN. :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D fuck i think this alone is enough to make me happy for weeks HAHAHAHAH.

(: yup hung till quite late.
hehehe oh my computer died on me for the millionth time this year. zzz

so if i don't fail any subject this semester i'm considered graduated. well... not so much on cloud 9 now since i had to come down with a flu and sore throat and fever right after exams ): im supposed to go sing k with the rest tonight. how to sing like that. i tried singing the easiest song already i sound like a tranny. omg tiff, my retribution for laughing at you.

gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh moodyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

okay lets see. my last paper is at 10.15am, i am supposed to meet geok and pw at 9am at dover meaning i must leave my house by 8am and wake up by 6.30am because i take damn long to prepare. oh, and im not sleeping cos i am not done studying. though i finished studying econs last week i totally forgot everything alrdy. power.

SO. im thinking if i should order macs now or just sleep and stand a chance of getting up super late and being late for paper.

hmmmmmmmm

don't understand why people in local unis like to call their subjects by their course ID. like ER1h2 or BC12n like WHAT THE FUCK HAHAHA

aiyo got so many things to say. nvm too lazy hahaha.
FRIDAY FREEDOM FUCKERZZZ.