you know, people like the photos they take because they look good or because they capture the moment exactly the way it was.

i like them cos they portray feelings that could have been fake. could have. 99% of the photos you take are happy pictures with everyone smiling in them. kinda deceiving don't you think? don't you ever wonder why we don't take photos of the times we are sad, angry, feeling anything else other than happy? maybe we were, but we forced a smile at the camera. makes me wonder why. are we so desperate to only keep memories of the good times? or are we just desperate to forget the bad times.


feeling more doubtful about myself than ever. sometimes when people ask whats wrong its not that i don't wanna share, its because i don't think they wanna listen to my philosophy on life. like, where do i begin right? so many questions but no answers. sometimes i cook up a story to fill in the blanks. okay its not really a story, its facts. but im not as affected by it as i say i am. so people tend to think i blow up the severity of what im 'worried' about. which is not the case, really.

i don't think im a very sad or angry person. just a person filled with many doubts that i can't find answers to. i always close up and give the 'i dont care' face which is what people mistake as the emo face.

actually i dont know why im blogging all this out. i just think its interesting to have logs of what im learning about myself each day.