recently i have been feeling lost. done and said things that were unforgivable and pushed people away. i know this sounds strange but i finally feel peaceful. i've found my peace with god. its just amazing to have faith in someone who has performed miracles for me before and i dont know why i ever lost touch.

actually i do. its because of shame. im ashamed of my actions every now and then. and i dont wanna bring down the good christianity name if i can't be a reflector. i still can't. but small steps yes? i once went on a 1 month fast from my computer and considering how hard up i was in the past that was a big sacrifice for me because i rly felt like dying. im not saying im gonna be jumping right back in and making promises with god instantly but im gonna start small. i'll be starting from my words. gonna cut down on vulgarities yes? but sarcasm is a must. HAHA okay kidding.

i wanna thank this person for touching me with how strong their faith is. its inspiring. with all thats been going down lately i could use some inspiration.

bye!